Earlier today I enjoyed a coffee and a crossiant at a local cafe. It is the last day of school holidays in this particular part of the world, and consequently children are literally everywhere you look. This is fine. Sure I saw a couple of kids smash a trolley apart before pocketing the handlebar (for what purpose, I couldn’t begin to imagine!), but they were hardly representative. But as I sipped my coffee a couple of shrill children yelled and shrieked, to the apparent annoyance of their caregiver. Now I just sat there and continued to drink my coffee. I didn’t complain. I didn’t yell or rant or rave. I didn’t even roll my eyes. I just sat there and wondered what it would be like to drink coffee in an environment that only consisted of adults.
My downfall, of course, was not wondering this at the cafe, but wondering it out loud – on Twitter – much later. A couple of people (literally two out of some 1,251 followers) complained. I removed the offending tweets. Though this was when the real fun began. Suddenly I was ‘burying the evidence’ of my offensive crime! So I can’t express the opinion, I can’t retract the opinion lest I become part of some elaborate conspiracy theory… Now what? Well I figured I would post this blog post to clarify my position and to make that position public record (thereby hopefully crushing any ‘cover up’ conspiracy notions). But mostly I want to write this because I don’t think it is fair for parents to bully me for wanting to drink coffee in peace.
In short I dream of a world where there are adult venues that are built around things beyond alcohol and gambling, where adults can get together and enjoy each other’s company around caffeinated beverages. That is my crime. Now please have me tarred and feathered. I hope you and your children never have such a dream or, if you do, you at least have the good sense to keep it to yourself.